


The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Supermarket

by sevil



Category: Anthropomorfic - Fandom, Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: AU, Anthropomorphism - Freefom, Challenge Response, Crack, Dried Fruits, Gen, Genderplay, Other, PWP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-21
Updated: 2011-02-21
Packaged: 2017-10-15 20:32:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/164683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sevil/pseuds/sevil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'm bored!“ said papaya to strawberry and jumped off the shelve.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Supermarket

**Author's Note:**

> This is total and utter crack, written because I got [fay_morgenstern](http://fay-morgenstern.dreamwidth.org/) hooked on dried papaya sticks, she tried to destroy my brain and I challenged her to write papaya porn to finish the job. How I ended up doing it and with a Sherlock crossover thrown into the mix is anyone's guess^^

"I'm bored!“ said papaya to strawberry and jumped off the shelve.

Strawberry rolled her eyes, shook her head and jumped after her. She saw her gliding along the aisle elegantly, twirling from time to time to show off her new coat. 'And a bloody fine coat it is, too' thought strawberry with a sigh and hopped faster to catch up. When she reached her, papaya was crouched over a read smear on the floor, peering at it through her magnifying glass.

"What is it, then?“, asked strawberry.

Papaya was too focused on her work and didn't look up, but she heard the coiled anticipation in strawberry's voice and a part of her can't help but be a little surprised.

"Nothing much“, she answered and snapped the glass back into her pocket. "Somebody was murdered here, but they moved the body and tried to clear the crime scene, obviously. Do try to keep up.“

With that she was off again, heading straight for the door at the end of the aisle of toilet paper which said "staff only“ in big letters. Strawberry looked at her with her mouth open, then closed it abruptly and followed her in a strange sort of hop-glide. Papaya was just crossing the frozen food junction, when suddenly a big mixed salad materialized in front of her.

"No trespassing beside this point“, he said and crossed his arms menacingly.

Papaya looked him up and down, then said with scathing derision: "What's it like in your funny little brains, it must be so boring! This is a crime investigation, and if you don't let me pass, another jam will die shortly.“

"No trespassing beside this point!“, says mixed salad, with more emphasize, and began to advance on papaya. With a loud clang and clutter, the stacked up tins of baked beans at the corner of frozen food and tin can alley came down, and papaya used the momentary confusion to slip past mixed salad into the short aisle of toilet paper. Strawberry met her at the door, standing slightly ajar, and they looked at each other.

"Do you really want to go in there? Could be dangerous“, said papaya, and gave strawberry a calculating once-over.

Strawberry looked back, steadily, and there was no mistaking the gleam in her eyes even as she rubbed a freshly formed bruise on her right side.

"Oh god yes!“

In a swirl of coat and adrenaline, they swept over the threshold and into almost complete darkness.

"It has to be here somewhere“, said papaya and began a methodical search of the room as her eyes adjusted to the dim light.

A few minutes later, she heard a loud rattle, then a low snarling and then strawberry whispered, very quietly, from the other side of the room: "I think I've found it.“

When papaya looked up, she saw strawberry slowly backing away, carefully stepping over the remnants of a broken glass with bright red raspberries on the cover, locking eyes firmly with a dog the size of a small shelve. The dog snarled again, low in her throat.

"Run!“, screamed strawberry and turned her back. Papaya could just see her running zigzag towards the door, the dogs teeth missing her by a hares breath. She looked around for something to throw and found an old piece of metal lying around (part of a water-tap, at least two years old). She saw it hit the dog in the side and heard his howl as he turned on her now. Now she was the one running for the door.

In the corner of her eye, she saw strawberry take a stance, then firing dried strawberry seeds through a highly illegal and most welcome customary gun in rapid fire at the dog. He howled, as some of it hit his sensitive snout, and his momentum was broken. With a final, desperate sprint papaya skittered over the threshold, saw strawberry turn tail and run. It took both their weight and a good bit of impact to close the door again, but close it they did, right in the dogs face.

They heard him howl in frustration as they slumped against the door, gasping. They looked at each other, and strawberry broke out, gasping and giggling.

"That... that was the most ridiculous thing I've ever done!“

"And you thought getting dried and stuffed into boxes were a good idea!“ Papaya was giggling, too.

"That wasn't just me“, said strawberry with a significant look, and they broke into fresh giggling.

"Worth it, though“, papaya said when she got her breath back „I know who did it.“

"You're gonna tell me?“, asked strawberry.

"Maybe“, said papaya, turning her head a little and giving her a somewhat surprised but pleased look. "Dinner?“

"Starving“, strawberry answered and caught just a glimpse of an involuntary smile on papaya's face.

Together, they strode along the short aisle of (toilet)paper and into the fake sunset of yet another day at the grocery store.


End file.
